Tuesday, March 27, 2012

I like being single. I'm not saying that I don't want to be in a relationship, quite the opposite actually, but I am pretty content with my life. It is what it is, and I should make the very best of it. I thought, like most young Mormon girls, that I'd be married and probably have a kid on the way by the time I was 21. I specifically remember thinking, when I turned 16, that I would be married within the next 5 years. Whoa boy, am I relieved that I turned out to be wrong about that!

One of my biggest peeves is when people complain about their relationship status. Once and while, in the company of close friends, over a pint of ice cream, is one thing, but on a daily or semi-daily basis is just ridiculous. In front of a whole group of people at church just makes me want to punch you, especially if you were born in the 90's. I've met so many people who I honestly don't think believed that life would begin for them until they were married, that as a person, their relationship status defined them. I really hate that mentality. How can you expect to be a partner in a relationship when you don't even have confidence in who you are as an individual? Only you can "complete" yourself- nobody else can do that for you. Besides that, it's just downright annoying having to listen or read post after post on Facebook about how you hate being single. Really, is there anyone that loves being alone? No, but I can guarantee you that complaining about it isn't going to help get you a date. And while you are at it, do something to improve yourself and most importantly, have some fun!

And now for some light entertainment.

When I was 14, I decided it would be awesome to stick 2 of those teeny tiny Cert mints up my nose. I was goofing off with a bunch of equally weird friends and I thought it would be funny, and it was...until my nose started burning with the fire of a thousand hells. The horrible thing about having a burning sensation within your nostrils is that, unlike when your mouth is burning, you can't exactly douse the inside of your nose in liquid. I guess you could inhale milk or water, but I'm pretty sure that would hurt equally as much as the burning mintiness. Another thing about stuffing mints up your nose is that when the burning starts, a panic sets in and you may suddenly inhale, causing those tiny mints to become lodged up your nasal canal in that awkward spot where your finger just can't reach. By the time you do manage to find a way to dislodge the mint, your eyes are watering in both gratitude that you finally got the mint out of your face, and pain because the burning is so intense you are sure your brain is about to melt. After this experience, you vow to never, ever, try sticking anything else up your nose again and to share this piece of wisdom with all of those that are around you.

You're welcome.



  1. Hilarious! One time I sneezed while eating a York peppermint patty. I know exactly how those little Certs made you feel, and yowzers, it's not a good feeling.

    I'm proud of you, Meg. Being single is sometimes fun and sometimes hard, and while I like being married, there are many things I miss about being single. You are so lovely. I love you.

  2. I am, quite literally, rolling on the floor, laughing. With tears and everything. I love that you feel free to share these awkward moments of your maturation. The stuff moms wait years to learn. I'm happy this is the kind of "experimentation" you engaged in as a teen. I'm quite certain it has developed in you the wisdom and insight you'll need as a parent yourself.

    I'm so proud to call you mine. Stand tall. You've earned that stature. I love you.